Prayers & Queries

(On the Subjective Value of Non-Existent Beings)

When I bend my knee meekly
and throw up a thoughtless prayer
to a God greater than me
I feel better immediately.

But it works regardless who I supplicate
with my fevered wishes.
I can pray to the moon
just as effectively;
moreso, actually
since the moon is so beautiful
and moves through the cloudy darkness in such majesty.

Or Mars, or Marduk, or Minerva
Aten, Aphrodite, Athena
it doesn’t matter the god I pray to
so long as I can feel its greatness
its greater-than-me-ness
I feel better immediately.

But if I happen to come out of feeling
if I dare to put a thought behind my heaven-sent address
if my prayer transforms itself into a question
a query or series of queries
then the great ones hasten to disappear.

Even the moon sneaks behind her clouds.

Likewise, if I pierce God with a few hard questions
if I skewer Him with whys,
He runs and hides.
Apparently He can’t take the heat.

No matter.
Whether query or prayer,
I feel better immediately.